This post is here to offer you some conscious and intentional communications training to help build your EQ muscles. Try this exercise to help you prepare for and lean into your next difficult conversation with a goal of mutual understanding and connection.

When confronted by a difficult conversation, frustrating email, or challenging personality at work how do you respond? Are you calm, present, and regulated, or do you tend to lose control and rule with an iron fist?

If the switch from reacting emotionally to staying present and balanced is harder for you, you aren’t alone. Don’t be discouraged if you need some help working through your default programming, it’s likely had a hold of you since childhood.

Does this look like professional success to you?

Working 12+ hour days, chasing the next deal, putting out fires and constantly feeling exhausted, thinking of your family when you’re at the office, and the office when you’re with your family. You sleep poorly, your workouts and stamina are becoming a distant memory, and you can’t remember the last time you actually flirted with your significant other? 

Then why are so many of us working and living this way? And what do you do to change it?

If you find yourself struggling to inspire and motivate your employees, and keep them feeling supported so that they can do their best work, I’ll tell you what I tell my clients—it’s not your fault, it’s human nature.

Your work is no longer about believing you have to have all the answers, all the time, and telling others what to do, instead it becomes seeking input from the team around you and empowering them to get the job done.

Have you ever wondered how I made the shift from Wall Street to Operations, to Executive Coaching? Last week I sat down with Dr. Chad Prevost and Dr. Shelley Prevost from The Big Self Podcast and Big Self School to talk about my journey from Leadership roles in finance and healthcare to coaching today’s leaders how to have more impact and less stress at the office and at home.

Stressed, Yelling, and Overwhelmed? Struggling to consciously choose how you want to respond? Want to push performance boundaries, show up as your best, and maintain the necessary focus and resilience to achieve your goals, I’ll tell you what I tell my clients--it all begins with a deep breath.

Don't dwell on feelings of overwhelm, letting them knock you off course! Dealing with the overwhelm effectively is less about managing time and tasks, and more about managing our thoughts and emotions. Learn to handle your teams complicated feelings, thoughts, and emotions.

“What if I’m missing something? What if they’re mad at me? What if someone needs my help? What if I’m letting everyone down?” rang the voices in his head.

Fresh off a week-long vacation, but super anxious. While he had mostly disconnected during his time off, it took him several days to get there. My client reached out because he was anxious about his return to work and what awaited him. Even more urgent, however, he was awakening to the fact that it might be about much more than a ballooning inbox.